we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
