Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
The air was thick with penises
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
My vagina is very pro this idea
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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