You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
