I don't remember. Are we still dating?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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