i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
