Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize