what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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