: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
