So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think im going to throw up on grandma
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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