Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
