"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
