wakey wakey hands off snakey
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
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