I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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