You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Randomize