Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
