I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
