ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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