We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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