He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
FUCK WHALES
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
