guys are only as good as the porn they watch
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
