kristin has been a bad kristin
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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