so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
