I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize