They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
