i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
The power of my boobs compel you
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
