evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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