i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Do you remember whose house we're in?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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