We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
