The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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