so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
