He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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