i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
