I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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