direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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