I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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