Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
