Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
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