Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Be still, my beating vagina.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
