oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Floor bacon is actually really good
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize