if i can run in heels then i can drive
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
