I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
bring money and cleavage
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
