ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
