I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
i believe in u and ur pee
Randomize
