I am puke
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
