I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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