it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Randomize