what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
