can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize