He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
