whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
