Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
